Remembering 2012

In October 1988, President Ronald Reagan declared October as National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month saying, "When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn't a word to describe them."
No, there is no name for those parents who have lost a child. There seems to be a divide between those who lose their babies as embryos, those who miscarry later or whose babies are stillborn, and those who lose their children after birth.
It is devastating to have a child who is stillborn or to lose a child after having a chance to hold and get to know them. The pain is more obvious and tangible and people are more understanding of the grief that accompanies such an event.
But for those who miscarry (a term use to describe the loss of a baby before week 20), the pain can be so easily dismissed by onlookers. “Oh, you can try again,” “you have a long life to live, "another baby will come along,” “get over it, move on and try again,” they might say.
What many people don’t realize, however, is that the pain is just as real for these parents because they missed the opportunity to hold their baby. It is extremely difficult to try again, some never do and people who haven’t gone through it are confounded as to why.

Light a Candle Together

Unfortunately, regardless of the circumstances, we who have suffered miscarriages, a still birth, a birth resulting in the death of a child, or even losing our children at an young age, whether it is 2 months old or 59 years old, we have out lived our children, something that no Parent should ever have to do, but we all have something in common, we have all lost a child and reality doesn't change that truth.
There is an increasing movement to help families remember and support one another on October 15. People all over the world are being asked to light a candle starting at 7 p.m. in whichever time zone they live. “If everyone lights a candle at 7 p.m. and keeps it burning for at least one hour, there will be a continuous WAVE OF LIGHT over the entire world on October 15th.” (October15th.com)

Still seen in the horizon..